Meditation2

Happy New Year 2005

Miss you all. I'm already wanting to go home.

10, 9, 8, 7...

The world didn't end, again.

This Asian herbal medicine tea/whatever is disgusting. After I knock a cup of this dark brown goo back, my body shakes in disgust.

Korean apartments have enclosed verandas around their windows to keep the cold air out of the rooms. It's so cold oustide that it's cold enough to use the verdana as a second fridge; there's fruit and some leftover pizza out there.

My cousin's friend said my voice sounds like that of a movie star's. Which movie star I don't know.

Everyone keeps reading my face like it's a palm and then reports to me that I have a lucky face.

People also tell me I look like a cute little high schooler.

Gotta take the good with the bad, right?

New Year's Eve festivities were kinda boring. We went to a hotel lounge that over looks Haeundae Beach in Busan to ring in the new year. We were given party hats, noise makers, and balloons on the house. Apparently at like 5 AM there will be thousands of people on the beach waiting for the sun to rise so they can pray for a good year. I'll be sleeping thankyouverymuch.

A business deal that fell through left my dad feeling totally enervated so my brother and I figured it would be good for us to drag him out of the house so we spent the entire day at the mall shopping, having lunch, people watching, sipping coffee. My dad bought me some awesome looking Lacoste knee socks which match a shirt I already own. My dad's girlfriend bought me a very french looking short-brimmed black wool hat-- it makes me look all precious like Amelie.

Fat (for a Korean girl)

Today's Adventures-in-Korea continued with a trip to the alternative medicine shop where they administered medically questional tests on me. (Since when did ancient Chinese medicine get so high tech with their computerized tests and printouts???) I got to see my blood cells on a monitor attached to a microscope. There was a scary looking seahorse-like shape swimming with the healthy cells but I was told it was okay and that I wasn't about to die. My brother had cells that looked like those spikey balls attached to a stick on a chain they used to hunt animals with or whatever hundreds of year ago. They said I am at my target weight and healthy (even with my slightly low blood pressure) but that I should try to get more exercise. I dunno how they figured this one out but they said that I have a normal level of stress but that I have a tendency to hold it all in. They said my liver needs a tiny bit of help; I can thank numerous gin and tonics for that one. I think that beginning tomorrow I have to drink heinously digusting and painfully bitter herbal medicines three times a day for the next two weeks. As a (ovo-lacto-pesco) vegetarian I think I should say nay to the deer antler tea they'll probably give me but the brown liquid is mysterious enough for me to let it slide. I am not looking forward to this.

I think I consumed every variety of Korean sea creature for lunch today. :loosens belt:

That enormous sashimi lunch was followed by an almost as large buffet dinner at a rather swanky hotel.

After dinner my brother dragged us out on the, literally, freezing cold beach to light roman candles. FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! Fireworks are so freaking fun but after igniting about four roman candles my hands were frozen stiff. My brother lit about a zillion more and made the lady selling the fireworks pretty damn happy. I haven't seen him that happy in ages.

We went to a video store looking for some Korean movies watch but the video rental shop had a serious lack of DVDs. No My Sassy Girl, no DMZ, or JSA, or Old Boy so we went home with Troy. Yes, that movie with Brad Pitt. And no, I did not watch it.

Did you know that in addition to PC bangs they also have board game bangs in Korea? Apparently no likes hanging out at home. Well, I wouldn't either if I was 22 and living with my parents.

Now it is time to eat some more delicious Korean junk food.

Interested is Interesting

It's unfuckingbelieveably cold here in Korea.

Also, my eating binge continued last night with an ice cream sandwich that looked like a gold fish.

Korea has very, very nice rest stops along the highway but unfortunately the bathrooms have cold air hand dryers not such a good idea when the weather is dipping below 30 degrees.

13 hour plane flights in economy class are insanity inducing. At least the 5 year old sitting next to me was incredibly well-mannered and so adorable. The inlight movie, The Borne Idenity, wasn't that good.

You know those "love hotels" they have in Japan? Well, they have those in Korea too and that "motel" my dad owns is actually a "love hotel." Mmm, kay....

Fa la la la la

I just ate a liquor filled chocolate that the guy we rent a parking space from gave us. Tasty.

Tomorrow morning I'm leaving to visit my dad in Korea for two weeks. I'll be back on the 9th so you will all have extra time to prepare my birthday surprises. :hint hint nudge nudge:

Yesterday I went down to San Jose to visit my mom's grave and to give Christmas presents to my little cousins. My brother and I got the cutest Care Bears for them. They're wearing sweatbands on their wrists and heads and when you press their hand they start singing and exercising. Their arms go up and down and the knees bend!!! Crazy! But dang, kids presents are difficult to wrap. The boxes are all oddly shaped and very bulky.

I finally finished my dad's gift. I got a big picture frame that fits six 4"x6" photos and because I'm me I decided that I wanted all the photos to be black & white so it would look more uniform. So, I dug through boxes of photos picked out some good ones, scanned them, cleaned up the scratches in Photoshop, laid it out in Illustrator, printed, and trimmed. Ta da! Except that it didn't go quite that smoothly.

Now I must go to the grocery store to get a travel sized toothbrush for my brother.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone.

Gmail invites

If you or anyone you know would like a Gmail invite please gimme a holler.

Sluggish

Hmmm... barely approaching 11:30 pm and I am already sleepy.

Tomorrow I'm going down to San Jose to go to the cemetary. Big day, must rest up.

Thursday I need to pack, clean my room, pay all my bills, return library books, and do about a zillion more things before I leave for Korea. So much needs to be done...

Cuddle time on the internet

Ah, so TheSmitten is getting married. Wow. A woman fed up with the NYC dating scene begins to blog about her dating horror/love stories and then ends up meeting another blogger and finds love! Her hubby took her to Paris to ask her to marry him!!! How fucking cute is that? I think they're gonna have to webcast the wedding... oooh, now that's an idea...

Dad

My brother just got some photos developed. My looks like... like... I dunno....

He does creep into people's houses quietly

capricorn (Dec. 22nd-Jan. 20th)
We saw Capi kissing Santa Claus
Underneath the mistletoe last night.
You didn't see us creep
In your house to have a peep;
You think all we do is work then go to sleep?
Then, we saw someone else kissing Santa Claus
It turns out Santa's not so snowy white;
But what a laugh it won't be
If Capricorn ever sees
Slutty Santa kissing number two in the night.
-- em and lo

broken record

Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah blah. Blah blah. My life sucks. Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah blah.

[          ]

emtpy

Sunday sucks as much as Monday

I can't concentrate.
I feel like I've been eating too much food.
I haven't left home since Thursday night.
I have a paper due tomorrow.
I haven't been sleeping well.
The Strokes CD isn't as good as I remember it being.

Someone told me I seem "comfortable in my discomfort." What a prick.

Phrase

I really hate the saying "more power to you" especially when said in a sarcastic tone.

This is what I do

I'm forcing myself to write.

The past couple days I've been seeing those sparkly lights that I get before a migraine starts. Last night my head was hurting pretty bad and now I feel really tired.

Today I saw the trailer for the new Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. NOoooooooo!!! Why? Why? WHY???

And on to more grown up crushing of sacred things...

I saw the movie Closer (Julia Roberts, Jude Law, Clive Owen, Natalie Portman). I saw it alone which would make it the second movie I've ever seen alone at a movie theater. (The first time was when I was 16. My date stood me up at City of Angels... Perhaps he knew it wasn't gonna be good.) Even I was speachless about how shitty people who are in love can treat each other. This movie is not for anyone with a strong faith in romance. Some people might say that this movie is completely unrealistic but I thought it has an extremely honest persceptive about sex and love.
Things to note:
- Long scene with Natalie Portman's thonged butt. Damn, she can spread her legs wide.
- Clive Owen? Amazing actor and hot for a caveman.
- Julia Roberts? Ehhhhhhh.
- Jude Law as a pitiful loser?!? Whoa.
- Explicit cybersex chat scene.
- So truthful it hurts dialogue.
- My brother said the movie made him feel literally sick.

Speaking of feeling sick, I also watched Trainspotting which I thought wasn't all that interesting. Not bad but not fantastic either.

I've run out of things to say.

It's all in her mind

My eyeballs hurt.

Emotionally, I feel really strange.

I woke up around noon today but laid in bed for another hour before I got out of bed. Usually right after I get up I make my bed and then take a shower but today, I went straight to kitchen, ate three cookies, then sat at the computer mindlessly clicking through my daily internet ritual (gmail, Yahoo mail, myspace, news, blogs). I made coffee, drank that, flipped through some magazines, brushed my teeth, daydreamed, and finally took a shower. My brother woke up and said something about how it was unusual that I hadn't made my bed yet, so I did. I asked myself, "Why do I have four pillows on my bed?" and then I didn't bother trying to think of answer. I started thinking that maybe I should work on my art history project but after thinking about it for an hour I gave up. The cookies weren't sustaining me so I figured I ought to attempt to eat some real food so I microwaved some leftovers that now looked like a bowl of mud. I put the emtpy, dirty bowl in the sink and washed my hands while watching the water fill up in the bowl, making a thin and murky pool. By then it was already dark outside.

So now, sitting here drinking my tea and wearing my slippers I feel strangely near tears. And it's not even half as dramatic as my writing makes this feeling seem.

Desperation

Lucky for me when I'm bored drama seems to throw itself at me no matter how hard I try to put my shields up to deflect the blows. Times like these call for desperate measures and my Catholic roots say, "Let us pray."

Dear God,
I know I had sex even though I'm not married but I don't think it's fair for you to punish me over and over again in my romantic affairs. I think that I've already had my share of stalkers following me around. It's creeping me out. Please, I would love it if you made the boys who like me of the non-stalker kind. Thanks a bunch.
Later,
Me

Thinking

There are some people in the world who don't deserve to be pretty.

Sexy like a slab of raw salmon

There's a fine line between sexy and gross.